Well, I haven’t written anything this week because there just hasn’t been much to report. It’s finals week at school. So I have 3 different projects/papers I should be working on and 4 finals I should be studying for. Naturally, I decided that it was a perfect time for a blog post!
The whole ‘getting into recovery’ thing kinda is on hold. Ish. My next appointment is next Tuesday. It was just really hard to figure out appointment times when I am working and/or at school 7 days a week. I haven’t stopped drinking. Honestly, I’m scared to stop without a treatment plan. I don’t want to stop and then fall off the wagon a couple days later because I’m not mentally prepared for what I’m doing.
Yeah, that’s how great I’m doing at eating well. I start my day with a really healthy super food shake. But it pretty much ends there. Stress has fully caught up with me. I need some time off. From everything. Luckily the semester ends next week and I’m not taking any summer classes. I’ll still have to work, but I will actually have some days off here and there. I’m going to train for and run a race this summer. A 10k I think. Having a goal helps me stay on track. But I’ve been too busy to train for races during school and I totally lost my motivation.
I sound like such a whiny bitch right now. I am really overwhelmed with how fast everything is moving at school and how slow everything is moving in regards to my therapy and treatment. Like having one hand in a bowl of boiling hot water and one hand in a bowl of ice water. My brain doesn’t know how to interpret the signals.